Wonders will never cease.

12:27 pm, August 27, 2004

I got my two-day pass to Bumbershoot. I have a feeling prior years would have been ideal to go, but I'm sure I'll find enough shiz to do to fill my little music-geek mind.

So, I had the pleasure to meet two MORE people from Wisconsin this week as I waded my way through, oh I wanna say about 9 beers on . . . what day was that? Wednesday night. In Bellingham.

See, the idea was to go up there, hang out for a couple days, move some shit out of Jake's house and drive that shit down here. And then Jake got the e-mail that he had a job lined up with his Temp Agency.

The woman tried and tried to call his cell phone all Wednesday, but "couldn't get a hold" of him. Yeah, you wanna know why? Because the dumb ASS didn't dial a '1' before the 425 and the rest of the phone number. Seriously, how much of an idiot do you have to be? And THIS is the woman who's supposed to set Jake up with a job. SHE CAN'T EVEN DIAL A PHONE!

I'd like to think we went up to Bellingham for nothing. Essentially to drink, play card games (Asshole and High, Low, Red, Black), and haul ass back to Auburn. Asshole's fun, by the way. You get in a circle, deal out all the cards, and the object is to get rid of them. It goes 3 through Ace, Twos are wild, Any pair beats any single card, and you just go around, trying to beat what's on the pile of cards.

The person who's last is the Asshole. While the Asshole is shuffling and dealing, he or she can give out drinks to anyone at any time. However, once the Asshole touches his cards, everyone ELSE can give the Asshole drinks. The winner is called the President. After the Asshole touches his cards, The President can give drinks to everyone. The Vice President (2nd place) can give out drinks to anyone EXCEPT the President, etc.

Also, every time there's a new Asshole, that Asshole can make up a new rule. Like, the Asshole can be Thumbmaster, or he can force everyone to refer to everyone with new names (like Princess Nipplecakes, Stanley Shitkiss, Constapatapotamus, El Trubadore, or simply Jesus: Your Lord And Master of All That is Here And All That Is Not). And, of course, if you fail to refer to everyone by their name, you must DRINK.

Of course, my personal favorite was, whenever someone cleared the pile by throwing a 2 or whatever, you had to say, in your best impersonation, "I'M JOHN KERRY, AND I'M REPORTING FOR DUTY!"

Hey, a big P.S. for all you Backyard Baseball fanatics out there. We are PLAYING this weekend. So, give me a call if you're interested. I'm not gonna post my phone number on this shit, but e-mail me or call me if you DO have my number. The more the merrier. I'm thinking we could play for two bigtime days this weekend, so if you can't make one day, you could always come for the other.

That is all. Be there or be square. Be Thurr or be Squrr.

Current Mood: In Doors
Current Music: Pearl Jam - Off He Goes (Live At Benaroya Hall)

Uh oh
2004-08-27 06:12 pm
A plateau is a high form of flattery.
The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
Once you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.
Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine.
When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair she thought she'd dye.
Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.
Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
Acupuncture is a jab well done.
Marathon runners with bad footwear suffer the agony of defeat.
A clumsy optician fell into his lens grinding machine and made a spectacle out of himself.

Re: Uh oh
2004-08-27 06:26 pm

Kon, that's it. Five kidney punches to EACH kidney. I don't even care if you deny it or not. I'm now making it YOUR responsibility, if you won't come clean to being the Mad Punner, to stop this maniac before I have to inflict MORE pain on your person!

You've been warned. Hath your douchiness no limitations?

Re: Uh oh
2004-08-28 03:40 am
Suck it C-man. I take no responsibility for the Mad Punner. Just do what Peteman does and check the IP addresses. I dare you to get anywhere near my kidneys.

IP Addresses
2004-08-28 12:44 pm
How in the HELL am I going to check that? Even if I could FIND your damn IP address, what makes you think I could even link it to your computer?

ESPECIALLY when you could just do it from work or someone ELSE'S computer, ya jackass!

I know your games, C-man! Won't work with me! Your kidneys are as good as hamburger, mark my words ...