I've read so much incessant bitching over the last two days, I think I'm now a pro..

10:45 pm, September 17, 2004

They put beet juice concentrate in my Breyers supposed "All Natural" Cherry Chocolate Chip ice cream. Great, along with soy bean whatsitsot and a bunch of other crap, I gotta worry about tasting beet juice in my ice cream! What is this? Oh, they say they use it for color. Well, I don't give a piss FUCK if it's fucking shit-green! Keep your God-Damned beets away from my tasty frozen treat!

I suppose you can't beat (huh huh, BEET) two 1.5 quart containers of Breyers ice cream for five bucks. But, I loathe to think what may pop up for "color" in my Vanilla Fudge Swirl. Lima Bean Extract? Whipped Goat Semen?

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And, what's the deal with these Library CDs? I rip them onto my computer, thinking I'm saving a few thousand dollars in the process, and what do I get? A bunch of inaudible skips and feedback! What are these people doing when they check out these CDs? Wiping their hairy asses with them? Flinging them at their dogs like Frisbees? I bet these fucking idiots think they're some strange-looking LPs, so they put them on their record players only to find out that I've gotten a job at the library for the sole purpose of finding the people who checked out these CDs before me so I can go to their houses and skull fuck them with a freshly made cheek-hole pounded through single handedly by my erect penis.

When I get myself a DVD burner, all you morons better watch out. My skull fucking glory days are all ahead of me. And, for those of you who have checked out both a CD and a DVD that I've tried to steal . . . well, that's why God (me) made the skull with two cheeks.

Current Mood: Huskies, Drinking, Drinking, Beasties, Drinking.
Current Music: Lou Reed - Sweet Jane (Live)