11:09 pm, October 13, 2004

I don't like the eye doctor. He keeps making fun of me because I'm fat.

You're not fat, you're just big boned.

That's what I said! But he doesn't listen to reason!


How's my little piggy today? Hop on the chair now ... don't break it. All you have to do is read the letters in front of you.




What does that mean?

It means, piggy, that your eyesight is never going to get any better.

*sigh* All right. Right now, I'm gonna be totally seriously, okay? If you call me piggy one more time, I'm gonna leap out of this chair and rip your goddamned nuts off with my bare hands!


I've been too lazy for too fucking long. It's time to run off this fucking gut before I lose sight of my feet and all apendages south of the equator.

Current Mood: I ain't givin' you no tree-fitty you God-damned Loch Ness Monster!
Current Music: Wilco - Why Would You Wanna Live