My So-Called Football Team.

I left in the middle of the second quarter with the score 21-0 and I have a vague recollection about what happened afterward. Apparently, it ended up being 28-17, with the other team being shut out in the second half and my so-called football team failing more than once inside the red zone. I won't read any re-caps - indeed, I won't be reading any articles whatsoever this week - for I'm protesting this so-called football team until they provide me with a victory (or until the bye week, whichever comes first).

I won't accept any solace in the fact that this so-called football team's defense is outperforming the offense, because the defense isn't good enough to carry any football game that matters.

I don't want to hear about how the running game isn't working. I just want it fixed.

I don't want to hear about injuries in the receiving corps. If it was such a major strength going into the season, then losing a couple guys here and there shouldn't have much effect. And if the quarterback is so touchy that he can't perform the way he's supposed to with guys playing in spots they weren't in the pre-season, then maybe we should find a quarterback who'll find a way to get the ball where it's supposed to go.

And MAYBE, instead of tinkering with a position like longsnapper when it really hasn't been too big a problem - where, by tinkering, you've made it into a MAJOR DISASTER - the coaching staff could watch some fucking tape and figure out a way to plug somebody in at right guard so the 89 year old man currently inhabiting that spot won't get burned by 360 pound tackles off the snap. Just a thought.

This so-called football team has been acting as if this entire season is merely a formality. Where's the heart, where's the passion? There's more heart and passion in the man who just retired than there is in the entire fucking squad this so-called football team is trotting out there every week.

So far as I can tell, there are only three guys out there playing with any fire whatsoever. Two of them are linebackers and one is a certain cornerback from a certain high school from which I graduated in the exact same class. Everyone else - coaching staff included - seems to be content with pocketing our 9-7 or 8-8 record, which may or may not net us the most depleted division in football.

If that's the case, I hope this so-called football team enjoys losing in the first round of the playoffs, because if it couldn't move the ball against that team last night, then it sure as fucking hell won't move the ball against any of the other top five teams from the NFC.

I guess it's good to know that now. Best not to get your hopes up too high around this so-called football team