There's something wrong with the show, and it's directly correlated to the relationships of the main four characters.

Everyone's with someone new, but it has the feel of a contrived conflict just to have everyone start hooking up again come February Sweeps (or, if they're ballsy enough to drag it out all season, May Sweeps). I guarantee it, Marissa and Ryan and Summer and Seth will be together in some romantic form by my birthday.

What made the show truly great last season was all the secondary characters. You've got Luke which, in spite of his main character status in the beginning, was always a static "jock" character. You've got Anna, Theresa, and Oliver who all had different personalities which made them all instantly interesting.

But, this year, you've got this creepy D.J. dude who I SWEAR will be raping Marissa before the season's over. Either that, or he'll get violent. Either way (and I'd like to think there isn't any subconscious mistrust of his being Latino), that guy is about as bright as a cave. Puts me to sleep every time he's on screen.

There's this Zack guy who's another snorer. Mr. Too-Perfect. Mr. Summer's Rebound. Mr. Four More Episodes Or Less. Don't get too attached.

And, for the fellas, we've got the two new ladies, Lindsay and other chick. Don't ask me to tell you which is which. There's a red-head who's pretty hot, but the writing for her is getting on my nerves. She wants Ryan, she doesn't, she wants him, she doesn't. MAKE UP YO MIND, BEEOTCH! Then, there's Ocean Spray hair who MIGHT be really hot, but she's always got some weird thing about her head. Funky hair, pisspoor makeup. This one, though, this character here is the only standout secondary character in the bunch.

For the season as a whole, though, it's really spinning its tires in the mud. It's taken all the episodes for Seth to somewhat get over Summer. Every week, there's some scheme to make her crazed or make her want him. And, as soon as we meet Ms. Redhead, we know she's destined for Ryan, but even THAT took like four episodes. And, if I see Ryan and Marissa going somewhere together "just as friends," I'm gonna throw my shoe through the television. Obviously, D.J. will be gone soon and Marissa will be pining over Ryan again. Ryan will be committed to Redhead, but they'll have issues with the whole upcoming Redhead being related to Old Man Caleb.

Here's to the North Shore ending in January so Hailey can come back. Tessa. GOD, what a stupid name!!!