The Descent? It's Decent.

I'm scared out of my Bejesusing Wits right now.

So, I believe I told you that because I'm so cool, I downloaded a bunch of classic horror films in honor of it being Oktober and since I can't drink beer for 31 straight days, I might as well be frightened out of my gourd.

I knew the essentials of what I wanted - most of these are movies I've either never seen or haven't seen since I was like 6 and ergo don't remember. Here's the list so far:

Halloween (the original, not the 2007 re-make I hear is kinda lame)
The Exorcist (the restored version, which apparently POPS off the screen better than the grainy original)
Night of the Living Dead (original 1968 version by that Zombie-Expert George A. Romero)
Dawn of the Dead (from 1978, from the aforementioned George A. Romero)
28 Weeks Later (which I hear is better than the commercial advertisements gave away)
The Descent

There's still a few more I wanna get (I seem to remember this movie with these white-haired kids with white eyes who control the adults of the small farm town with their minds), and I think I've found the right website. It lists the Top 100 All Time Horror movies. The usual suspects were up there (most of the classics I just listed), but I was surprised to see that movie The Descent in, like, the top 3.

It was made in 2005 apparently, and I for the life of me couldn't remember hearing anything about this movie except it was another caving movie. I already saw The Cave - which is AWFUL, the worst movie ever, indeed almost as bad as Red Eye - so I figured, "OK, The Descent is going to suck balls; next song."

I watched it tonight. OH, MY, GOD!

For the first hour or so, it's pretty drab. Six chicks go into this cave and root around, get lost, and realize one of their friends screwed them because they're not in the cave they thought they were exploring. They're in a new cave no human has ever been in. Or, rather, a new cave no human has ever ESCAPED!

OK, but it's not that cheesy, really.

Anyway, it putters along for an hour, and then for Christ's sake, the last half hour is as intense as any movie ever! You know Gollum from the Lord of the Rings movies? Well, imagine Gollum, only he's like normal human man size. Now, imagine you're in a cave and don't know the way out, and there's like 50 of these normal human man-sized Gollums crawling on the cave walls. And they're HUNTING YOU! It's pure chaos for the rest of the film.

Now, I'm not your average girlie man who normally gets scared by 'Scary Movies', but I honestly shrieked like a woman probably a dozen times as I clutched my teddy bear and cried for my mommy. It's about a half hour later and my heartrate is just NOW getting back down to normal.

I'm gonna try to make it through 28 Weeks Later in a minute, but I don't know if my constitution can take it.