I'm the Osiris of this shit! Wu-Tang is here for-ever, mothafuckas!
Wellsir, today is the first day of the rest of the Sonics' tenure in Seattle. The day when we land the prize hog in this year's draft; the day when we start receiving the kind of attention middle-of-the-road cities like Cleveland, Miami, and Denver have been enjoying for a couple years now.
That's right boys and girls. Today is the day where we put oversized novelty boot to Luke Ridnour's kiester and say, "Yippie-ki-yay, motherfucker! Get your ass to Georgia!"
And then we'll say hello to Kevin Durant. And then we'll trade Ray Allen to Boston for the #5 pick. And then we'll trade the #5 and the two second round picks to Memphis for the #4 pick and say hello to Mike Conley, point guard from Ohio State. And then seven picks later we say hello to Spencer Hawes at number 11 ... because nothing says Supersonics Basketball quite like having four useless center-like creatures bumbling down the court like gangly Baby Hueys.
OK, with that out of the way, here's how I hope things shake down:
Draft Durant, KEEP Ray Allen because he's got at least four years of putting up 20+ points a game and he's got at least 6 or 7 highly productive years in him, trade Ridnour, draft Acie Law IV as our backup point guard (for now) and stare in amazement at next season's lineup:
Chris Wilcox
Rashard Lewis
Kevin Durant
Ray Allen
Earl Watson
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Nick Collison
Johan Petro
Acie Law IV
Damien Wilkins
Robert Swift
Mickael Gelabale
Mike Wilks
You know what's missing from this group? Backup shooting guard; but that's not important right now because there's no way this is the final makeup of the Sonics once the season starts.
Rumors abound, including the fact that the Bulls love Collison, Houston and Dallas really want a crack at a sign-and-trade with Lewis, everybody wants Ray Allen, and nobody thinks Damien Wilkins should get more than 10 minutes a game until he stops being selfish and starts playing D.
Draft is tonight. Please don't fuck this up. Please don't fuck this up. Please don't fuck this up