Fuck It, Sports (The Return).

Too much good shit going on, let's go to the Rundown:


• Sonics - Look, it's just going to be ONE of those years. Young, feisty team that's also chock full of useless veterans who are three years past their prime (if they even HAD a prime). Wally Szczerbiak taking 20 shots to get 20 points is going to kill me, though. He shouldn't be getting TWO shots, let alone twenty! Listen, if you believe that this is a complete overhaul rebuilding project, then you've just got to bite the bullet here and start five youngsters. They keep talking about Sene getting minutes in the NBDL because he's raw; fuck, give him minutes NOW! In the N-fucking-BA! It's what we did with Rashard Lewis in his rookie season and look at him now; making millions of dollars more than he's worth while having his usual 19/5 season. No more Wally Szczerbiak, no more Deldonte West, no more Kurt Thomas. End of story.



• Mariners - Hot Stove Action: Comin' Atcha! How does it feel knowing you have absolutely no shot at any of the bigtime names being bandied about? Johan Santana might as well be the Keebler Fucking Elves, because the concept of him in a Mariners uniform doesn't even exist. Sure, we've got the talent they'd be asking for, but if you think this management group has what it takes to secure the long-term deal he's seeking, then I've got some beach-front property in Nebraska to sell you. What's our solution? Hiroki Kuroda, Free Agent. The Mariners have been better than the rest at snagging the best Japan has to offer. Obviously Ichiro, Kenji is coming into his own and locking down the catcher position for the next five-ten years, and even Kaz Sasaki had a solid 2-3 year run with his nasty forkball and his puny 88-mph fastball. They say this Kuroda guy has a 96 mph fastball (which means in reality it's something like a 92 mph fastball) and some other solid out pitches, with a history of low E.R.A.s and high winning percentages. Is he Johan? Of course not. But, he's managable, he's cheaper, and he beats the piss out of Horacio Ramirez (and I haven't even seen him yet; he could be fifty years old with arthritis in his elbows and that last part would be true).



• Seahawks - Because I feel compelled to say something. Scary game this week, I'm not gonna lie to you. Shaun's back, it looks like. If that means anything, it means more of the same sub-par running we've gotten from Mo Morris the last three games. Ho hum.



• Huskies - I've never wanted anything more than I want to knock Hawaii out of BCS discussions. I'm sick and tired of every year there being some undefeated WAC team pummelling a bunch of junior college misfits on their way to an undefeated season only to hear these jackass sports analysts saying, "Oh, well, they're undefeated so they should play for the championship!" Bullshit. Put Hawaii in the Pac-10, let that Brennan guy get smacked around by some REAL defenses (not saying the Huskies are a part of that elite catagory, mind you), and see if they're still 12-0 or whatever they are. It's all fucking relative and will never be decided until there's a playoff system in place and that's about as likely as there being a viable third-party candidate in a U.S. Presidential Election. Although, I will contend until the day I die that the Husky team that lost only one game on their way to a Rose Bowl victory with Marques Tuiasosopo at the helm was on such a roll at the end of the season that they would've CRUSHED everyone else in a playoff system.