O.C. Excerpt.


That adds up to 70, which is what I've been pushing up the last couple mornings. Sure, I'll gladly take your steroids test.

This in spite of the fact that my body would rather roll around with a coke fiend's heartbeat than sleep when I want it to. Part of me wants to believe it's the sudden infusion of coffee-and-only-coffee into my daily drinking diet since work started up again. Whatever, all I know is I either sleep 12 hours or I sleep 6 hours for like three days in a row. It's nuts.

You know what I've noticed since moving to New York? The headline writers for the newspapers here are VASTLY more creative than they are anywhere else I've seen papers. "That's Oil Folks" read the cover of the AM New York this morning, a story about Trans-Fats being wiped out of New York restaurants within ... I guess a year? Or, how about this doozy: The New York Giants are on a bit of a losing streak, and after that horrific loss to the Titans two weeks ago, one sports section said, "It's Tom To Go" with a picture of angry, embattled coach Tom Coughlin on the cover. An inner headline in that very same paper read, "The Final Nail In The Coughlin!" Incredible! Where do they come UP with these things???

What, you want my opinions on The O.C. so far? Well, I don't know if that's befitting such a macho manly-man as described above - have you forgotten the 25-20-15-10? - but I'll see what I can throw your way.

Taylor and Ryan? Sitting in a tree? I don't know how I feel about that! I mean, I'll just say this and get it out of the way: There is no WAY this is what the creator envisioned when he first signed up to do this show. If the O.C. was a planned-out, mapped-out story from the get-go, this thing ends with Ryan and Marissa together and that's the end of it. But, things happened, and now we're here. Really, I guess it's the only thing that makes sense, since the show seems to be running low on available girls - unless, of course, somewhere someone has the foresight to make a pedophile of someone with 15 year old Kaitlyn.

So, did you hear the news? The actors who play Seth and Summer have broken up in real life! You think it had anything to do with the fake Rhode Island storyline? God, I hope so. But, anyway, this looks like just another nail in the Coughlin for this show. How's the O.C. gonna coexist with two of its three stars being exes after a multi-year relationship?

By the way, can we have The Bullet in every episode please? Just like Kaitlyn Cooper in a bikini, let him have his own little square in the corner of the show, and The Bullet can just walk around slapping the asses of all women he passes while saying, "POW!" God, that guy's amazing! If we get enough sweet elements to this show, we can start watching The O.C. like the Brady Bunch intro. Kaitlyn and The Bullet and a close up on Sandy's eyebrows ... what the hell, throw in a gruff-looking President Palmer, he's not doing anything anymore, maybe Kirsten hitting the sauce, throw in a couple loops of Luke getting punched in the face from the first season and Caleb Nicholl dying of a heart attack in the pool. That just leaves a box for Ryan and Seth's man-talks and a box for Summer and Zombie Marissa to wrestle - sometimes in Jell-O, sometimes in KY-Gel, but everytime with me as the referee! Oh crap! I forgot about the Hailey in the buff square! Oh well, I guess we don't NEED Ryan and Seth's man-talks ...

All in all, this season's going swimmingly though. I'm just waiting for Kaitlyn to screw up and fall for one of Luke's douchey younger brothers. Oh the strife, oh the conflict that would cause!