I'm needy. I've decided that "You'll Do For The Evening". I haven't had sex in a while; a month, a week, thirteen months, eight and a half years, two days. I'm standing here pretending that you're interesting; pretending I care about 18th Century Literature; picturing your mouth around the head of my cock; wondering if you swallow; wondering if I could get you to swallow if I told you I thought you were pretty, the prettiest gal in this place, the prettiest I've ever seen. I'm telling you about myself, my day, making sure to leave out the part where I passed a little something extra with the gas I released during dinner, making sure to point out the generosity I exhibited in donating that money to the animal shelter because I think that's something more people should get behind because the abuse has to stop and not because it's a healthy tax write-off and oh yeah, by the way, I'm fucking loaded. Oh yeah, I'm hot shit with a big job and a fast car and look at you, you just got so wet on me here's another drink. Time for the clincher, time to seal the deal, because what do they say? - Always Be Closing? - yeah and I'm here with you and I've put in my time and it's not getting any earlier, so if I don't get you to go home with me, then I'm stuck jerking off into a sock in my swank studio apartment on the Upper West Side and I didn't just blow upwards of sixty dollars on the Name-Brand-Get-Me-Pussy liquor on the likes of you to go home and jerk off into a fucking sock, so this is how it's gonna be, this is what I'm gonna say; I'm gonna say, "You should come home with me" and you'll demure because you don't consider yourself That Kind Of Girl - you're no tramp, you're no floozy, and besides, you don't want to appear easy on the first night because you're of the shortsighted belief that this might go somewhere because I'm SUCH a great catch and your parents would fucking piss themselves upon hearing about their so-so-Sally landing the likes of me - but you've been rubbing your hand on my bulge all evening on the dancefloor which leads me to know you'll do as I say if I give you the proper seduction, so I say, "Come on, just a drink" and you'll weigh that one over and you'll be on the fence teetering my way and then I'll throw in, "We don't even have to sleep together; I'll pay for a cab if you want to leave." Like that, we're off and I make every effort to touch you in a way I can tell you like to be touched.